Mostly back to normal

Dan and Aimee arrived on Sunday evening after a wedding in LA. It is so good to see them! Yesterday was a lazy day of them doing some work, me baking, and Aimee and me knitting. Pot roast and mashed potatoes with apple pie for dessert. Aaaahhhh.....

I am feeling almost like my old self, although I haven't yet attempted any yard work. Last week I spent four absolutely terrific days in Seattle visiting a girlfriend and enjoying a family reunion at a memorial service for Mom's oldest sister. (At 96, she had lived quite a wonderful life.) Everyone commented on how good I looked, which I decided was because their expectations were very low. I didn't get tired, which surprised me, tho I also spent lots of time sitting and relaxing.

The edema in my legs comes and goes. It's with me right now and I'm seeing my PCP in a few days to see if she has any ideas for a solution. I've read that edema can be permanent following chemotherapy. I hope not. It's rather uncomfortable, and I don't relish the thought of wearing compression hose for the rest of my life. Whine, whine.

I missed last week's rain, tho I can see it in the snow on the mountains. I also missed the Giants final win. Three World Series in five years—a dynasty for sure!

Much love,

Katie

Life gets even better

A cousin in Tacoma, WA, is faithful about sending a cheery get well card every week. Dear Georgina, you are a trooper and a sweetheart. Thank you for your faithfulness. This is the latest. For several weeks I was sick and tired and sick and tired of being sick and tired. But fortunately no more. I suppose if I have to undergo more treatment I will have to modify that statement. For now life is darned good.

This afternoon I met my book group buddies for the first time since July. It was so good to see them again and feel that I'm returning to normal activities. We had planned a Chinese dinner for our meeting this evening but the San Francisco Giants appearance in the World Series brought that to a screeching halt. A smoothie and cookie at Toot Sweets was just as good. Lunch with friends at the Lab tomorrow—in Livermore, where I haven't been since July—signals a real return to the kind of life I expected to be living when I retired.  

For the gardening cleanup I can't do, I ended up hiring someone. It felt rather like an admission of failure, but I'm trying to fight that feeling. On Saturday, I removed most of a bed of plants in anticipation of the big waterwise, front yard re-landscaping project and was thoroughly pooped on Sunday. I'd have done that six months ago without missing a beat and gone on to do another 4 or 5 hours of work. Now however, I've got a ways to go and I'm trying to accept it gracefully. Hah!!

The Giants were 3-0 last time I checked. Go Giants! Beat those Royals!

Love to all,

Katie

Getting better

It's been just nine days since my last radiation treatment, and it feels like weeks. I have so much more energy. I haven't napped since just after returning from the hospital. Al's daughter Robin and her family visited for lunch today, including granddaughter Jessica and her daughter Anastasia who are visiting from Spokane. Jess and I are very good buds and of course I adore my great-granddaughter. It was a fun visit and I expected it to wear me out. But good news, it didn't.

It's true I don't have much physical strength; I did move that big pumpkin on the porch, but I tried to lift some bags of potting soil out of Al's truck and couldn't. On the up side, I went shopping at J. Jill on Saturday, my first shopping expedition since July. My pants are falling off and I need a few to tide me over until I put almost 20 pounds back on. Which I know will happen, darn it. I'm driving again and feeling more and more like my old self.

I comb my hair very carefully to avoid revealing the big pink spots. And then I run my hands through my hair, as I am wont to do, and there are the big pink spots! Fortunately, I've almost stopped losing hair. Not quite but almost. A girl can hope.

Today is 26 years since Al and I were married at the little chapel in Yosemite. I am grateful to him for so much.

My love to all of you,
Katie

I'm done!

I had my last radiation treatment this morning. Glory Hallelujah! I got the certificate below when I left. It's fun. At the risk of being a tad negative, it seems unlikely that all of that cancer cells are gone, although of course I hope so. I have another appointment at the radiation center on December 3. CT scan time. The moment of truth, perhaps.

I felt so much better over the weekend after receiving two units of blood on Friday. On Thursday morning when I walked into the radiation center, the nurse happened to see me come in and was instantly all concern. I was practically limping I had so little energy. The two docs appeared out of nowhere, took one look, and insisted that I go to Kaiser to get fluids. They were also certain I needed a transfusion. The nurse called Kaiser so by the time I got home and called Kaiser myself, it was all set up, just get over there and I was in. Kaiser also drew blood and those numbers prompted the call a few hours later at home to come in on Friday for a transfusion.

Yay for modern medicine. I went grocery shopping on Saturday for the first time in weeks, and made a slow-cooker stew on Sunday. My energy is still far lower than I'd like, and I suspect weeks will pass before that is back to normal. I bought a big pumpkin today and discovered I couldn't pick it up. What's with that?! Still, I'm feeling better and many of the symptoms I've had are beginning to fade away.

This morning I took an orchid and a batch of brownies (another Saturday project - woo hoo) to the radiation center staff. They have been so caring and supportive and are such a wonderful bunch of people. I am very grateful to them and also to the wonderful nurses in Kaiser's infusion center. They have all made a truly ghastly time more bearable.

Mom continues to be in charge of scut work, bless her heart. Al is my cheerleader in chief when I get blue, chauffeur (tho I'm beginning to do some driving), and all-around wonderful husband. And thanks to all of you who continue to remember me.

Love,
Katie

Yee-haw!

I learned this morning that instead of having radiation treatments through October 15, I will be done next Monday, October 6. It may not seem like much to anyone else, but I am euphoric, delighted, thrilled, excited, elated, ecstatic, over the moon, et al.

Then two months must elapse while I recover from radiation damage before CT/PET scans can be performed. I'll know then what the tumor looks like and whether surgery will be possible/necessary. The fun continues...

Love,
Katie

Woo hoo!

I'm getting my legs back! My knees and calves are pretty much normal now. My ankles come and go. I can now usually see the tendon that pops up when you point your toes back toward your legs. I am most grateful these days for pee, as in producing lots of it and getting rid of the edema.

On the down side, I've had blood drawn twice since I left the hospital and my white, red, and platelet counts are back in dangerously low territory. Doing the littlest thing exhausts me. High-energy Katie has been replaced by a pod person. I'm so hoping for a transfusion or two ASAP. Did you know - I didn't - that platelets are a spectacular yellow-gold color?

Pod Katie also has a pink spot on the back of her head from hair loss. But I notice that the accumulation at the shower drain has dropped to essentially nothing. Perhaps because chemo is done? Will it start coming back? Curly would be great fun.

I'm off to message my oncologist and beg for a transfusion.

Love,
Katie

It's been too long

Sorry for the long radio silence. The last two weeks have been an adventure, but not the good kind. I finished the second (and last) week of chemo and soon became very ill. I went to the ER on the 16th with severe shortness of breath and a fever. It turned out I had nutropenia, which is an extremely low white blood cell count. Neutropenia in adults is generally defined as a count of 1,700 or fewer neutrophils per microliter of blood. My white count was 800. Explosive diarrhea ruined four or five days. I was anemic and received a blood transfusion. Then my platelet count was low, so I received a platelet transfusion. I was pumped full of fluids for the entire time and now have chubby knees, shins, and ankles. I hear I'm supposed to "pee out" the edema. We'll see.

I was in the hospital through yesterday, the 24th. I cannot say enough good things about the staff of the Modesto Kaiser hospital. Still, home never looked so good. A shower. Real food. My own bed. No more tether to the IV. Three weeks of radiation remain.

The flowers, cards, emails, and phone calls I've received have meant so much. I've not been as responsive as I'd like to be. But now that I'm home and feeling A LOT better, I hope that will change.

Love,
Katie